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From the category archives:

Kids

A little girl on a plane…

by wdf on April 1, 2011

in Kids

An MP was seated next to a little girl on an airplane so he turned to her and said,

“Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, “What would you want to talk about?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” said the MP. “How about global warming, universal health care, or stimulus packages?” as he smiled smugly.

“OK,” she said.”Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first.

A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass.

Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?”

The MP, visibly surprised by the little girl’s intelligence, thinks about it and says,”Hmmm, I have no idea.”

To which the little girl replies,

“Do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming, universal health care, or the economy, when you don’t know shit?”

And then she went back to reading her book.

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Visting Grandpa in hospital

by wdf on September 16, 2010

in Kids

A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa.

When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa’s room …

“Grandpa, Grandpa,” she says excitedly, “As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!”

“What?” said her Grandpa.

“Make a noise like a frog – ’cause Grandma said that as soon as you croak, we’re all going to Disney Land !

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The Firetruck

by wdf on July 20, 2010

in Animals,Kids

A firefighter was working on the engine outside the station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides, and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

The girl was wearing a firefighters helmet. The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat. The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.

‘That sure is a nice fire truck,’ the firefighter said with admiration… ‘Thanks,’ the girl replied. The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had tied the wagon to her dog’s collar and to the cat’s testicles..

‘Little partner,’ the firefighter said, ‘I don’t want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat’s collar, I think you could go faster.’

The little girl replied thoughtfully, ‘You’re probably right, but then I wouldn’t have a siren.’

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I’m a rabbit

by wdf on May 12, 2010

in Kids

You think?

rabbit

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No nanny required

by wdf on May 11, 2010

in Kids

Well, we are glad that the ‘keeper’ of this little treasure went to the trouble of putting some nice soft blankies in… THE CAGE!

95d23/huch/1021/093

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Angry grizzly bears

by wdf on March 18, 2010

in Animals,Kids

bear_salmon

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How to achieve an orgasm

February 24, 2010
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The importance of planning

February 11, 2010

One night 4 college students were partying until late and did not study for a test which was scheduled for the next day. In the morning, they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty as possible, with grease and dirt. They then went to the teacher and said that they had gone [...]

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What Part Of Your Body Goes To Heaven First?

November 19, 2009

The nun teaching Sunday school was speaking to her class one morning and she asked the question, “When you die and go to Heaven, which part of your body goes first?” Suzy raised her hand and said, “I think it’s your hands.” The nun asked “Why do you think it’s your hands, Suzy?” Suzy replied, [...]

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Ever Wondered Why Generation Y is Called Y?

November 17, 2009

There is a very good reason why Generation Y has been given the term ‘Generation Y’….

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