WorkDayFunnies.com
Subscribe to WordDayFunnies.com by email, click to have a dose of humour delivered to your inbox.

Posts tagged as:

religious

The Tax Man Auditing a Synagogue

by wdf on March 5, 2010

in Random

At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a Synagogue.

While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, ‘I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?’

‘Good question,’ noted the Rabbi. ‘We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles.’

‘Oh,’ replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer.

But on he went, in his obnoxious way: ‘What about all these bread-wafer purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?’

‘Ah, yes,’ replied the Rabbi, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. ‘We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send us a free box of bread-wafers.’

‘I see,’ replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. ‘Well, Rabbi,’ he went on, ‘what do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?’

‘Here, too, we do not waste,’ answered the Rabbi.

‘What we do is save all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick.’

{ 0 comments }

Post image for Four Worms, A Sermon

Four Worms, A Sermon

by wdf on November 26, 2009

in Random

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol -Dead

The second worm in cigarette smoke – Dead

Third worm in chocolate syrup -Dead

Fourth worm in good clean soil -Alive

So the Minister asked the congregation – What can you learn from this demonstration?

Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said, “As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate,
you won’t get worms!”

That pretty much ended the service.

{ 0 comments }